return~~

im facing my hard times dis fews days....
whole day slepink n crying in my room...

mgade2 kn...
one of my fren said dat la....

huhu....
wat to do....
i cant tink of any...
LOST!!!

i din go to d intrview...
my headache ruined my mood....
n more i've no heart to go...

so i dcided to stay at home
n sleep je....

whole day hearing my atok
screaming....
he's sick....
funny....
he tot my ayah was dead....
nyanyok tol....

he tot he stayin in hotel...
he askd my nurse(my kakak)
bpe gji kje cni??
hahahaha~~
adoiyaiiii.....

my ayah n ma...
very patient wth my atok prangai....

ok...
nw im jobless....
since i runaway from pgkor huhu~~

homesicks....
my flu gettin worsts thre....
huhu~~

so i dcided to leave pgkor....
more d envirnmnt thre...
scared me...
too many weirdo...
mat rmpit...
huh..countless....
even d resort drver pon scared me...
dat pkcik..loves staring at ppl....

dat place was nice...
juz im nt so ready to work...
mybe...
more....
account dprtmnt...
huhu...
im so not into figuring....
aiyarkkk....

rather than i suffring thre...
so i runaway...
thnks dear cuz support me..
tika n mokna...
so sad leavng them....

bt i want to leave...
i dn care a'more...
i juz wana b home...

wen i arrved...
my mom n dad quite shocked la...
huhu~~

bt i act norm =P
my sis noe d story...

its hard~~

its hard 4 me....
thing stil fresh n clear in mind....
evryting hpnnd...
at one shot....
i cant think...
really cant think....
pangkor taught me...
dat im not ready to b far
from those i loves n cared most....
deep inside my heart
im hoping dat thing wil b juz fine....
insyaALLAH...
dt wl b my bggest regret...
frndship....
i cared d most ...
down to lose it....
frenship to me...is
prcious.... i juz cant think a'more...

cry aLONe~~i,ve been thrown away~~

thing dat i scared d most in my life
~losing sumone dat i loved~
and it hppned again~~
cuz im losing my besfren~~
because of my own mstake...
i din tex to her informed dat im hre...
aready hre~~
my bad....
juz wana create srprise to her....
but smone aready told her....
one of them is her scndal~~

i din blamed them...
wen dis thing hppend.......
it shocked me really deep....
she using harsh words to me....
bt i pt it aside..
keep on aplgzing to her...
im so not ready for another lost...
i tel her d real stuation...
hopes she'll undrstnds...
bt my efforts seems useless....
she dn even care at all...
she shouted n yell at me...
(in tex la)
~im a crying beby~

feeling like my decision cme back to KL
is a mstake...
its create dssater to me....
im sorry...
you are one of the reason y im here
again in KL.....
bt u din see dat...
u wth ur anger....
n ur emotion...
i dowan to blamed u..
cause i love u so much....
i admit dat i love u more than
others n oso more than my self...
i never said i hates u...
i never said "go to hell'' to u...
i never ask u to ''go brmbos''

i din tex u~~
i din infrmed whre am i....
if cmpared wth u...
i tink ds is my frst time did dat~~
bt totally dsaster....
wut bout u?
i blievd lots of times u din tel me....
u go out wtchng mv wth skinny spec guys....
u go out dinner wth bos..
u go visits kB few times...
u told me u only been thre 2 times....
bt i juz keep it to myself....
cause of wat?
cause i love u....

las year on 1st august~~
u left me....
u went eating wth skinny spec guys.....
i was so sad dt time....
riot at msjd india.....
wat i 've been doin thre??
i wnted to buy bngle 4 u..
bt i was so unlucky dat time...
i was alone dat time...
bt u said..sokay meet up at tS...
i feel such a rlieved....
i waited omos 2hr thre...
thn u tex me u goin out wth him...
i feel like a dumb dat time...
wait 4 ur tex..NIL...
i dcided to leave dt place...
tot u gona asks me to wait..but u said
ok..juz dat...
~enough wth d past~

then wen u said u hates me...
thnking of leaving da...
bt i dint...
cause i loves ds frenship...
ur my bg sis....
so i kept it aside....
n act nrmal.....

Ya ALLAH,,,,,,
d only thing i asked...
is to hold her wen im nt around...
i noe..n deep inside me felt dat...
dstime...
we will neve b d same.....
loso
our frnship omos 2yrs....
end in a day.....

u said so....

i dowan n uwilling too....
i hates d part of losing bstie....

juz wan u to noe dat...
every momnt we shared...
every smiles n every tears....
i really apprciated it....
n...
i neve regret i noe u....
u aways my kind bestie...
u knew it urself...

hopes u wll do jz fine
wthout me...
tkecare of ur health...
gt nw pstol....
rduces ice taking....

im fine wth evry name u kol me....
evry ur harsh words....
ur temper n ur anger...
im juz fine wth al of it....

t.cre~~
sory bout my exstence in ur life...
i neve regret i noe u...

~my paus drowned wth tears~

okairi~~~

guys im back to KL 4 GUD~~~~
soon im goin to yell out
d story here~~
wel im juz hepy
dat im here now~~
missh all d besties =)
n fams =)

bienvenue~~~PANGKOR~~

arrved~~stiawan at 1.30am~~
mak pck up~tka n me~
arved home~~
sleep...
bt cant sleep pon~~
FLU~~~
bes part i left my vicks dem~~
huhu~~
3hr in aircond~~fufu~~
so damn cold~~
sleep wth my sweater on~~
fuhhh~~
at 6am....
wke up~~
tke shower then gt ready ~~
wait 4 pkcik then grak to Lumut JEtty~~
so many things~~
bought d feri tcket~~RM10~~~
time to sleep~~
all t way to pgkor jetty~~
i sleep~~my head was so spinning n more~~
im on d water huhu~~
CRAPPPP~~~=P

reached jetty then kak lia(pson inchrged)
pck up~~
bye mak n pakcik~~
drect to meet t HR mnger~~
MR aDIb(he using bd romance rgtone)
huh!!!

k wuteva~~
lalala~~
otw to hostel ~~
mokna askd kak lia~~
bout d poin in ds resort~~~
sadly la kan~~
they rceivd RM80/point las mth~~
erkkk~~~
(tkesima sketika)
huhu~~~

arrved at hostel~~~
ermmm d room juz nice~~
i got my own bed~~heee~~~
juz bring one dremon pillow je~~
then went to shops kt bwah~~
ouh~~
i syesly hve to really limit my xpnses here~~
(more after noe bout d salary)
gulp~~ =(

wat to do~~
my choice kan~~
so so so~~
sdey gak la~~
arghhhhh~~~

migrain~~
huhu~~

but d hosmate ok la~~
kak lia n one trainee~~yan~~
all d staffs ermm~~
hotel ppl kan~~
huhu~
time to act cold hee
ouh im so not pramah
cmpared to mokna n tika
silent is btter hee~

~out~

OUHHH MY GUCCI..MY DIORR... huh wuteva!!!

wutso eva lalalala~~

adoiiii~~~

wen suddnly my ayah~~~

suh cont degree~~~

weeeuhhhh~~~

i aredy gt t job.....

n so soon goin to pgkor~~

weeeeuhhh~~

then my mom plak~~~

kawin??

aiyoooo~~

maaaaaa~~

im juz 21 (dis 28th june)

LOL.....

mai2 spe nk msok mminang haha~~

wat laaaa~~~

i noe my bestie,,,tika,,

muz b so damn piss off

if i told her i dowan to go to pgkor~~~

erkkk~~~

she warned me....

dat im goin to b regret

if i din go wth her~~~

huhu~~~

wat de~~~

ugutan ituuu~~~

ermmmm....

wat to do heh~~

then my sis~~~

d nurse~~~

she oso keep askin me~~~

y??

Y??

adoiiii~~~

ngungkit~~

y i din go for spa~~

dats 2 years ago~~

nw i hve done wth my dip lorhh~~~

ishhh~~~

gram3....

wat can i say kan~~

weirdo...im a freak k??

huhu~~~

so dem misery niii~~~

me again~~

at frst al jz fine~~
then bcuz of a post...
evrytng screwed up~~
then ~~
all d blamed on me....
cooL huh....
wel im juz me....
hates argument....
dun like it~~
cuz at last d pain wth me~~
its hard to be me....
i think i am simple...
bt truth im not...
my life full wth probs~~
lots to thnks~~
huh~~
wteve it is....
life hve to move on rite....
hopes i'll b strong thre....
far from fams....
far from all that i loved....
myb a week o two i'll be totally
sad thre~~
bt hopes aftr dat i'll b gud...
or else....
KL im comin to ur hug....

*sigh*
sorrow sank deep in my blood nw....
i noe...
wen i pick pgkor~~
evrytnng gona b chnges....
n i noe dat.....
i cant simply cme back to KL
huh....
far away~~
so far away~~

hopes my fams wl b juz fine...
so do al my besties....
along,nely,bum,~~
tika is wth me~~
hopes i can ngam wth her~~huhu
really gona mish all of u ladies ;)

new journey....
new chapter of my life....
soon....
GOOD GIRL GONE BAD??
OR STAY GOOD??
heee~~juz wait~~
i'll updates to al of u here~~ =)

winking at the fture~~

so hows....
it is either confirmed job at pgkor....
o waitin for govt job koling....

i really hops gt d govt job....
bt it's not cnfrmed yet
as i juz sent my e-mail few days past~~
n stil hve to wait 4 intrview....

pgkor...
d GM ofering me back of the house~~
admin...acc dprtment....
even d basic is low...
bt as long i hve a job
dats fine cuz at least i can earn sumtink
rather than keep on waitin
4 sumtink dat uncnfrmed~~

so im leaving....
hops dis gona bnefits me soon...
im soo berat hati to leave
all d fams,,,
all d beties,,
all d frens here...
ouhh~~
fu..fu..fu..
(T-T)

~out~
minna..jz wait 4 my latest update...

CONFUSED~~

wel i gt d job....
but deep inside my heart~~
im nt willing to leave~~
its hard to mke decision~~
fuu..fuu...fuu...

dn really think bout d degree a'more....
juz thnking bout
heping my parent,,,,,
ouhhhh,,,,
leaving o stay?!!
dem....
i cant mke any dcision!!!
hate it!!!

YA ALLAH~~~

i want to work~~
at d sme time~~
i dowan to b far from my fams~~
more at ds time~~
my grndpa juz moved in....
n he's sick....
so my mom hve to look after him~~
since all my dad sibs
none of them wana tke cre of my atoK...

o i loves my mom so much......
crapp...
i cant think of any now....
~~~~~

~out~

sitiawan~Lumut~pangkor~ (xedit)

OKAIRI~~~ (^_^)

well juz gt back from pgkor~~
mish my blog hehe
;)
ok whre to begin erm~~~
ok...

my real intntion was accmpnying
my bestie je~~
bt thre~~
i joined them to d intrview~~
LUCKY me....
i gt d joB;)

Back of d house la~~
account departmnt~~
weeeeuhhhh~~~
kinda shocked me~~
y account??huhu~~

thre....
i stayed wth our 'MAK ANGKAT'
she's nice prson n very wlcomed us~~
thnks mak...
n oso we gt new mama thre~~
mak besfren frever~~
dey both really nice n caring ;)

orite,,,,
my frst time step into d feri~~
uhuk~~
so dem shaking~~~
in d feri~~
i juz kept silent n pretnding like
im slepink~~
ouhhh~~
my head spinning dat time~~

huhu~~

FOR ALL~~

THEY LOVE YOU...
BUT..
THEY ARE NOT YOUR LOVER...

THEY CARE FOR YOU...
BUT..
THEY ARE NOT FROM YOUR FAMILY..

THEY ARE READY TO SHARE
YOUR PAIN...
BUT...
THEY ARE NOT IN YOUR BLOOD RELATION

THEY ARE.......

FRIENDS!!!!!!

TRUE FRIENDS!!!!

SCOLDS LIKE A DAD!!
CARES LIKE A MOM!!
TEASES LIKE A SISTER!!
IRRITATES LIKE A BROTHER!!
AND FINALLY....
LOVES YOU
MORE THAN A LOVER....

BAD ROMANCE...OooooOOoOoOo~~

dun judge people easily...
dun mke ur own assmption....

words might hurt,,,,
damn its hurt!!!

shit hppnd evryday...

euhhh~~
wteve it is...
if u dn like me....
its okay...

but u hve no rite to judge me....
n accused me...
wth sumtink dat rdiculous n stupiD!!
i tink dat ur matured enough
to say like dat....

bt wteve it is...
loves is wide~~
u can loves anyone u wan....

bt not evryone dat u loves
will loves u back...
im hepy cuz hve owned
my PRETTY2 WOW besties...
dey always wth me...
ain,along,tika,bam,nely n amal...
thnks babe...
ur all are my drugs ;)

ahah~~
my blog frens...
j-chan n kiki =)
mye-hun too~~
lalalala~~
thnks girls =)

juz b urself....
neve tot dat my life wll b dis hard...
bt i stil thnk ALLAH...
my fams n besties stil wth me...

cry alone...
i hope im gone...
bt....
i still loved all d people
around me...
hopes i'll b strong enough~

ma psan"INGAT ALLAH"
ayah psan "JGN TGGAL SOLAT"

haaaa~~loves both them....
=)
iALLAH....i'll b gud ~~ ;)

ask urself!!!!

huh..
as simple as dat~~
ermmm....
im d one who spposed to say
dat words to u!!!!

snce u been silent to mE~~
i've been wonderin....
y?
am i making any mstakes ke?
o any harsh words i said to u o
anytink la~~
bt i cant find any~~

u juz left me like dat~~
ignorant!!!
huh~~
if u dowan o dun need me...
juz straight to me...
ur silent killing me....
demn....

then one day...
u cme back n
put all d blamed on me!!!
wat d~~~

i tot im sooo over u..
bt....im not....
i need time....

i dowan to say much here....
juz....
i neve regret i noe u....

INSYAALLAH~~
soon...jz soon....


~out~

i think i've done enough~~~

ouhhh...
im leaving KL tonite~~
hehehe~~
bt actually berat hati gak.....
bt i aready "bought" d tcket hehe~~
thnks dear 4 d tckets =D
i hopes im mking d rite choice~~

i juz wana b sumbody..
i feel like notink je here~~
im too naive n too trusts~~
d past is real...
so demn real...
i have to let it go.......
sweetest escape~
hehe~~

i have made my mind...
dat...
i am sooo not goin
to cont degree~~~
i have to extend my intntion~~
i did filter my decision~~
i have too~~

huh!!
guys dun asks any..
cuz i hve no idea
wats on earth im thnking now~~
past fews days..
my mom said bout..
moving to mlake...
ouhhh...
tot its over da...
ishh~~
im sooo not goin thre,...
thre r no mnorel,star n etc....
aiyooo~~~

minna-san..
jz pray d bes 4 me...
onegaiiii~~
siyesly...
im soo goin to miss all my GF ~~


ain is LOST in her own world~~

Dead! ( Live AOL Session ) - My Chemical Romance

(~,^)

Cry alone, I've gone away
No more nights, no more pain
I've gone alone, took all my strength
I've made the change,
I won't see you tonight

Sorrow, sank deep inside my blood
All the ones around me
I cared for and loved

Building up inside of me
A place so dark, so cold, I had to set me free
Don't mourn for me,
You're not the one to place the blame
As bottles call my name I won't see you tonight

Sorrow sank deep inside my blood
All the ones around me
I cared for and most of all I loved
But I can't see myself that way
Please don't forget me or cry while I'm away

Cry alone, I've gone away
No more nights, no more pain
I've gone alone, took all my strength
But I've made the change,
I won't see you tonight

So far away, I'm gone.
Please don't follow me tonight
And while I'm gone everything will be alright

No more breath inside
Essence left my heart tonight
No more breath inside
Essence left my heart tonight

peaceloverespect~~~

geek..freakk...weirdo~~

i slammed my door~~

n i regret it soooo much~~

huh~~

im a mess....

im useless...

cant do anytink rite...
cettt~~
my own fault kot...
im d one dat dowan to
accpt d fact.....
truth is pain rite...
uishhh~~
i tink i hve to move on~~

tika goin to pgkor nxwik.....
n she insists me to go wth hr...
ermmm wel dear..
i really wan tooo...
but..
thre is aways but in my life ~~

huh~~
*sigh*
i really hve to move on.....
i need supports here~~

actuallyyy...
i dun hve any idea wat to do nex
wth my life
dats y i juz lepaking at home...
reading novel~~
on9~~
slepink~~
play wth d kiddo~~

my life is boring~~
o im d one dat mke it borink
huhu

i miss d studnt life~~~
dun hve to think too much~~
ouh snapp!!
i miss dungun haha~~

hopes i'll finds sumtink to do
wth my life~~

ouhhh im a freakkk laaaa~~

STREET VENDETTA

a novel by MAZNI AZNITA~~

i've spent my whole day wthout

doin anytnk juz to fnshed d novel~~

i do really like ds novel~~

bes~~

its a story bout a girl

named ANABELLA IBRAHIM...

met a guy named KOJIE a.k.a FEIRUZ

whch is d son of bella bos Dato' Abdullah

n at d sme time kojie hve a twins brother

named FAKRUZI....

KOJIE work s a car pulller

for a fnance agncy

his style is messy wth straigh long hair..

he was assgned to pull bella's car....

so many things hhpend btwin them

during d process~~

kojie accdntally fllowed bella to cherating~~

bella gona fght 4 her love~~

iqbal,,,

at d sme time

iqbal is goin to b engage to mira(bella schoolmte)

bella tried to sparate d couple...

she was too obsessed in gtting iqbal...

bella is a tricky girl n love takin

advntage on people kindness

kojie is a kind hearted n honest guy..

n naive n aways been fooled by bella...

bt he still heping bella n stayed wth bella

at cherating...

he was bout to leaves cherating wen he

realized bout his real felink towards bella "love"

he's gettin jeles wth iqbal..

so he dcided to leave~~

mira n bella fight~~

iqbal cncled d engagemnt ceremony...

bella leaving d resort wth iqbal

kojie fainted *hs body is weak*

n oso he cant accept dat hs lover

leaving him T-T

kojie return to KL wth

broken hearted...

he tried to find bella all around KL

bt failed~~

5mth later~~

BELLA return to KL~~

she was spnding hr time at hr hmetown~~

she met FAKRUZI....

a guy dat look exactly like kojie

bt in dffrent style...

FAKRUZI is d owner or ships cmpany

deep in her heart..

BELLA Is missing Kojie...

she love KOjie...

bt she gt no idea how n whre to find kojie...

he stalked FAKRUZI

cuz he blieved dat Fakruzi is kojie....

bt both them are totally diffrent...

kojie in her eyes is a messy n coward guy

fakruzi hnsome n polite bachelor

a women ever dreamed....

bella found out dat KOJIE was killed in

an accdnt las 5 mth...

n she found out dat kojie is fakruzi bro...

bella was sooooo guilty

bcause she dn hve t chnces to aplogzng

n xpress her real felink to kojie..

he cant accpet fakruzi bcuz she stil

cant get rid from kojie...

bella loves kojie soo much...

furqan...

fakruzi step bro...

revealed d truth~~

d one dat killed in d accident is fakruzi

not kojie like all been told....

his dad Dato Abdullah

manipulate d stuation...

he dowan kojie to leave him as bcuz

he lost fakruzi....

kojie cant accept wat hppned to him...

BELLA...

met an accdnt ~~

all d villgers n hr fams been told

dat she's dead...

her sisters gve d info bout

bella death to kojie...

kojie was soooo dpressed cz

dn hve d chnces to telling bella d truth....

but destny brought them back

to d place dat closed them...

dey meet again at d resort...

love is in d air~~

"LOVE IS ALWAYS A BEAUTIFULL THINGS IN OUR HEART"

~sweet n sour~

exhausted~~

woke up early sket today~~

hunting 4 job....

out at 10 am~~~

wait 4 air panas rapid huh~~

40 mins waited at d bsstand~~

snappp~~

orite...

met along at capsquare~~

pusing2 je.....

then received tex from sumone

offering a job 4 us~~

hee~~

*Sory nt intrsted*

hehe~~

then moves to bkt nanas monorel~~

met dhya thre...

accdentally~~

moves to pavi~~

wth along...

dhya moves to TS~~~

my real instinct is looking 4 job...

bt suddnly feel like dowan to work je huhu

tah i juz loves be around wth my frens hehe

orite~~

times square...

met tikah,bum,n afy thre...

n oso dhya la~~

lunch tghter at MCD~~~

then muvee~~~

THE LOSER~~

kewl muveee juz hates d seat laaaa.....

huh!!!

then back to pavi again~~

go to the loaf~~

filling t forms...

then been intrviewd by t mnger huh~~

i cant blievd dat i shaked his hand =$

erkkk~~

felt so uneasy hoho~~

ok then....

pass d intrview~~~

RM5/hr~~~

bt i dn feel any excitement pon~~

dunoe la~~

myb d ennvronmnt kot~~

ermmm.....

hve to stat wokin on dis wed~~

how ha?

huhu~~~

then bum interviewd kat strbucks~~

later~~

moves to sg wang~~

dinner at...

PAK HAILAM kopitiam~~

huh~~

then separates at d monorel station~~

sooo reallly exhausted~~

n till now i cant tink~~

am i goin to accept dat job o not...

dn hve t heart pon to work thre~~

how huh??

ermmm~~~

ain ahmad cant tink rite now~~~

bt siyesly im hepy wth them today~~

loves them all~~

thnks to all my GF~~

along,tika n bum~~

n oso to d "insane couple"

dhya n afy hehe~~

merci beaucoup mon ami et mon amies.....

why?knape?nande?

feel so stupid plak...

*sigh*

all i planned seem like notink

to 'u'.....

so sad....

i need time...yeah...

still need time

to learn how to live alone...

yeah do admit dat its hard....

dunnoe y.....

u d one dat closed to me now...

only u~~

erkk~~

wat on earth im thnking now...

im no more me...

ur influenced a part of me...

n now....

juz cant think any...

gosh...

mcm2 hal....

(~,^)

HALIJAH BT ABD WAHID

OUH MY MOM...

I LOVES U SOOO MUCH....

THNKS 4 EVRY SINGLE THINS

U'VE DONE....

IM SOO PROUD IM UR DAUGHTER...

U TAUGHT ME LOTS MA....

U RITE ME FROM WRONG....

EVEN I AWAYS AGAINST U BT...

I LOVES U...

EVRYTING U DO...

I JUZ LOVES U...

NOTINK I CAN DO TO PAYBACKS UR

SCRIFICE EQUALLY..

BT I'LL POMIS I'LL B GUD....

I'LL B SUMONE DAT U WLL

PROUD WTH...

MAMA..

I LOVES U....

THNKS 4 EVRYTHINK....

N SORY 4 UR EVERY TEARS....

ILY SO STRONG HEHE~~